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Monday, February 11, 2013

The Anti-Valentine? Love it!

 Roses are Red
  Violets are Blue
Is there an Anti - Valentine's day book
  Out there for you?
Happily, yes, there are two. 

I am delighted to share something not quite as Valentiney as all the rest of the Love-ly books annually displayed in bookstores and libraries.  These two treasures made me laugh out loud and each offer a slightly different take on the holiday of love. 

Zombie in Love by Kelly DiPucchio, illustrated by Scott Campbell, is exactly that.  Mortimer is dateless for the upcoming Cupid's Ball. What's a vampire to do? He offers his heart to one young lady. She's not interested in the shiny organ.  He offers a diamond ring to another unsuspecting young lass. She is not quite enamored with the finger that is still attached.  Mortimer decides to place an ISO ad in the local paper listing himself as TALL, DEAD, AND HANDSOME.  Will someone similarly undead meet Mortimer at the Cupid's Ball punch bowl before the stroke of midnight?
I Loathe You by David Slonim is a little tale of unconditional loathing between a Big Monster and a Little Monster.  Written in rhymed verse, Big Monster assures...
"I loathe you more than chicken pox,
  more than stinky, sweaty socks,
  more than garbage in a dump,
  or splinters sticking in my rump. 
  Mosquito bites? I loathe them, yes,
  but next to you a whole lot less..."

Little Monster returns the loathing...
"I loathe you more than slimy rats,
  more than frostbite, skunks, or bats!
  More than fuzzy mold on cheese,
  more than fever or disease!"

But what if Little Monster goofs up? Becomes well-behaved and well-mannered? Then what? Can Little Monster always count on being loathed?

Take a break from the lovey-dovey and enjoy these two not-so-Valentiney treats.

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